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Welcome to existance, potential is here.
This has to be my one jobless afternoon in a long time.

Hello everyone, how you all been? I guess i better put some decent posts in this space before i ditch blogspot for tumblr (THANKS TO M!) But what the hell am i suppose to talk about? Not much except, i miss my neighbour with a cat named "Tikus".

Im currently pissed because somehow my fone's not able to send texts and this overwhelming emo state is kicking in bad. Ill ask someone to find out why. In the meantime, im hoping we're going for Tahlil tonight. I miss it.

Mocks are just a few days away and i aaam damn not prepared and its starting to smack me back to reality. Im not enjoying it one bit. And i havent been productive in a while, and its something i should get started on.

Should i leave everything? Should i go on? Should i give in? Its these times where Paramore and Switchfoot can becomes great saviours and make sense of everything. Sometimes i cant believe how things turn out. Then again, if things didnt turn out the way it did, i wouldnt be feeling any more human. Thanks to HF, i feel it. I feel like a solid, human being.

But how dare you say we're not as close as we used to be. I never thought of that. Its really sad to hear it coming from you.

I miss my babygals alot too, sko is really a bummer. I dont want anything to move. I want to cement everything to where i want em to be, so i can always keep em near. Selfish, but true.

Was suppose to add up some photos here but somehow the uploader isnt working at the moment hah :p

Now i wanna make a cheese sandwich. Turra~

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Saturday night was awesome cause i get to steal your first kiss!
This year, everything's gonna go right for you. I can feel it in my old bones. I know you had a blast haha those tears were proof :D
This is just the beginning and for years to come, ill still have your back.
You always in my heart.



My thoughts, they let me down.

Theres no comfort in the waiting room. Just nervous faces.

Okay, listening to Death Cab for Cutie every night, on REPLAY, on each song does not help my sleep-deprived mind. My holiday is not going the way i wanted it to be. I mean, just in certain parts. But the more i think its not gonna be good, its gonna TURN good. Right? Yes, cause thats how my logic is. And it works that way.. Somehow :p

Kendo workshop ended yesterday but it still feels like i have to wake up every morning at 8 for training. I guess i just miss it. I miss seeing everyone and i miss getting muscle sores and leg pains. I really do. It gives me a sense of relief and feels like im doing something right in my life. So during the workshop, i always leave early cause i had to be somewhere. And everytime i step outside the dojo, i have this heavy feeling in my heart. Like i wasnt suppose to leave. I WASNT, afterall, cause there was so much to do, so much to say, and so much laughter and fun to go through. I missed every closing ceremony and something good, no.. something AWESOME happens after im gone. Its so sad. I feel sad. Cause i didnt fully seize the day. I feel.. guilty. I might not be good at it, nor perfect, but my heart was full on for it. Thats what gets me coming back everytime.

Alex Senpai :D

And you, you still make me wonder sometimes. Your words, where do they come from? Did they come from your heart? Or did they come from your past experience and just decided to stamp them on me and called it "for you". I dont get it at times. I dont get why it hurts sometimes. And i dont fucking get why my defense mechanism aint kicking in cause i need it to work f something might go wrong. And you make me trip in my own words, i love it. You get me falling for you everytime, i have to admit that. And id never brush you off, id get distracted at times but i always come home to you. But sometimes my thoughts go to 'Youve had this before and now youre just doing the same thing but with someone else, while i never had this.' My first intention was to always be there for you, and that hasnt change. Im trying to be brave, but you just leave me weak. I dont want to begin this sentence with an "I" again, but I! get confused on what you really see. Maybe i shouldnt know everything, maybe i dont wanna know anything at all. Maybe it might hurt again. Maybe i understand too well. Maybe, just maybe its about you, HF. Thats a lot of maybes.

Fuck, this ship is sinking deep. So deep that, "I cant turn back, in fact i dont wanna turn back". Is there another word for love? Cause id like to say "I Love You" in codes.

Other pictures:

And lastly.. Stripper alert! :D

Haha you know i love it when you lift me up and spin me around :)

Gots to jet.
My thought is turned on you, xo.



I wanna be brave.
WHAT --Have you people been up to this holiday? I know what im doing. Im spending my time with the people who are important to me, thats all :D

Anyways, more sensible pictures in my facebook. Cause im feelin less and less of the love for this space.

I love..



To the one very special sleepyhead.
Stop reading my blog, cause omg i cant believe you found it :P Im officially embarressed. Are you happy now?

Fuck im really embarrssed. HAHAHAHA f i delete this, its on you :P

Your hair <3
HELLO! So half of my AS exams are over and there are two papers left. Thank god. I went out last night to let out some steam and just to forget all the maths formulas and calculations that ive had in my head after my p6 exam. EXAM EXAM EXAM - they seem to occupy us all lately havent they? Well, pictures!

AISH, MAS, there you go, the pictahs :P

I cant sleep well lately. I TRY TO, but my mind wants to be alive all the time. I want to sleep. Help me sleep.

I miss faf and yus. And wanna, was good seeing you that night :)

Gnight, P.